A toxic person can generally be referred to as a person who leaves you feeling exhausted, unhappy and emotionally drained after spending time or having a discussion with them. A toxic person tries to intimidate you to get their way, never apologies sincerely, guilt trips you, doesn’t do well when turned down and can be excessively jealous. Other features are that they do not respect boundaries, they give sarcastic compliments, acts like the victim in every situation and sometimes never accepts a fault without pulling some else down.
Books and medical experts will advise that the best way to deal with them is to avoid them. This is true in most cases, but how do you deal with a co-worker or boss who has lots of toxic traits, because you’d find at least one person like this in every office. So unless you’re ready to lock yourself up in a room alone for the rest of your life, you must find a way to deal with toxic people without letting it get to you. Here are a few ways to deal with people with toxic traits without letting it get to you.
Identify Their Toxic Traits
One step into dealing with a toxic person at work since you can’t avoid them totally is to identify the trait that throws you off balance. This is the most important step. Without identifying this, you’d have no way to either prevent it from happening or dealing with it. Although if the toxic person is your boss, it might be best to find another job because you might not be able to speak up about it or avoid them.
After realizing the toxic trait of the individual, the next step will be to set limits. If you don’t do well handling a co-worker’s disrespectful compliments, try to limit your chit chat with them. Also, consider eating alone instead of sitting on the same table at lunch; just ensure that you distance yourself respectfully. Try not to pass any message across to hint that you are avoiding them, be quick to think of another excuse.
Focus On Positivity
Everyone has a song that helps make their mood better, a blog to read from, a scripture from the bible or any other thing you turn to when you’re down. This is what you should focus on when the negativity rises up. Stay polite, say less, take a walk and listen to whatever makes you feel better.
Use Your Support System
We all have a support system, friends, spouses and family members that we can rely on when we are having a bad day. Someone who is willing to listen to you vent out your anger. When you’re dealing with a toxic person, lean on them and talk to them about your situation. Most times talking about your anger and frustration makes you feel lighter and emotionally balanced.
Speaking up about this to the person can really help (unless the person is your boss). Understand that speaking up might not yield many results because they mostly never admit being wrong, however; it helps you feel better, gives the person an understanding of how badly you are affected and also ensures most co-workers are in the know in case of any further misunderstandings in the future.